Argument

I amuse people. Most people consider this to be a good thing, for who doesn't want to be a source of amusement to their friends and loved ones? It is a good thing, most of the time, and I am happy to produce a laugh, or a smile, and often I will dance like a ridiculous, bouncing jester to achieve such a reaction. But what I mean is that I amuse people because of my convictions. I am so serious about it sometimes, which makes them less serious, which makes it harder for me not to get defensive. Two things I do not want to be: defensive, or judgmental. I think I do a pretty good job with avoiding those dark areas. But I also don't apologize for what I believe in, even when I am alone in the room, and this amuses my peers.
There is absolutely nothing I can or could do to prevent an earthquake. A tsunami. No daily decision I make, no words I speak, no stand I take can prevent deaths from a natural disaster. An unnatural disaster like human trafficking or exploitation of children is so overwhelmingly disastrous, and yet I usually feel there is little that I can do. I mean, I can donate money to the right groups and causes, and I could even go so far as to join the right groups and causes, but there is not a lot of concrete daily actions I can take while living my life in San Francisco that will prevent these things from occurring.
So I pray, and I donate money, and I think about how awful the world can be, and then I think about how the word awful does not even begin to describe it. And then the moment hits where I realize I can either continue in the depressive, helpless decline, or I can get up and remove the weights. I don't pretend that these things are not happening. Instead I take advantage of life and focus on the goodness. And then I pray some more.
Here is the thing, though. When it comes to the atrocities of factory farming, I know that my daily decisions have an effect. I know that what I decide to purchase or support is an action with a consequence. It is not that I feel that animals have it worse off than the exploited or hungry children, or that they deserve more rights or more care. Of course I do not feel that way. I cry for their suffering, and I feel pain and shame when I think about the reasoning behind all of the suffering, but I cry for the earthquake victims, too. However, nothing I have done in my past has contributed to the tragedy in Haiti. When it comes to the unreasonably destructive methods of farming, slaughtering, worker exploitation and environmental catastrophe, we have all contributed, myself included.
So now I work to make up for the naivety of my past, because that is something I am capable of doing, every day, on my own. My heart aches for my fellow women and men, especially the little ones who we are supposed to take care of, and my heart aches for our Mother Earth and all of her creatures thriving on her skin. It is up to us to nourish and cultivate, and end our soulless destruction. It starts with our daily choices in our everyday lives, and I want to make the right decisions. There are sides, and I want to choose the right one.